Domestic Abuse

What is it?
Any kind of threatening behaviour, violence or abuse which takes place between adults who are family members or partners (including ex-partners) can be described as domestic abuse.

There are different types of abuse:

• Physical - this includes hitting, slapping, punching and so on.
• Emotional - this is when one person makes the other feel bad about themselves, making them feel scared and worried.
• Financial - when the abuser controls the victim by taking away their money, not allowing them to work or dictate how they spend any money they have.
• Sexual - forcing someone to have sex or touching someone without him or her wanting to.

What should you do?
You should always remember that what is happening to you isn't your fault and that help is always available. Some people find it helpful to start thinking about how they can keep themselves safe and there are some ideas for you on these pages.

If you plan to stay
Not everyone feels able to leave an abusive relationship or situation. So, if you are planning to stay where you are, think about the following:

• Try to talk through the situation with a friend or a family member you think you can trust;
• Get help and advice if you can from organisations who can offer support. Click here for more details and think about where or how they can contact you without your partners' knowledge;
• Think about using a code word with children, family, neighbours or friends to alert them to call the police if you need help;
• If you are injured, try to get medical help and ask for them to be recorded and photographed in case you want to use them as evidence in the future.

If you plan to leave

• If you feel that you are able to leave the situation you are in, these ideas may help;
• Pack a bag with essentials, including important documents, telephone numbers, cash cards and any medication you need;
• If you have children, talk to them about your plans if you can and if you think it is safe. Explain what is happening and take them with you;
• If you have any pets, there are schemes that can help you while you get yourself sorted out. Click here for helpline information;
• Take identification that might help others to protect you or confirm your identity - for example, a passport, national insurance number etc;
• Try to get legal advice.
  

How to get help
In an emergency, dial 999. If you are not in any immediate danger, call the police non-emergency number on 0845 1 25 35 45.

Organisations that can help

Childline - a free helpline especially for children and young people - 0800 1111 - everything you say will be kept between you and the counsellor.

NSPCC - 0808 800 5000 - free for information and advice